Today I chose to be a writer

Tomorrow I think I'll Be a Fisherman

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The Parable of Origin

Ancient Titans play their games; Stasis and Flux don their staves.
Each their will and way; they circle one another in disdain.
Pushing and Pulling they remain, infinitely thus ordained.
Yet some foul day a catalyst would array, and tip that balance away.
-The Elder Prophecy

A motionless center is surrounded by an everlasting cyclone; a duality that reverberates throughout the ages. Guided by a force much greater than simple intention, a vessel approached the fulcrum of all Being.

The Lookout

In the grey hours of the morning, a groggy lookout sat precariously in his crow’s-nest watching the mist swirl about the seas. He was glad that morning had come, as this would mark the second day of his lookout shift. Tired, wet, and isolated he sat, eyes set ahead in determination, desperately seeking something.  Soon, once the morning sun broke the horizon line, the first mate would announce shift change and he could get some much-needed rest, but until then he held his eyes wide open.

The Pearl of Faith had embarked on a perilous journey across the Seas and through the impassable storm towards a sacred end. It had been weeks since they had burst through the eternal storm, with the help of the priest, and into the Forgotten sea. Yet still, their destination eluded them.

The lookout stared drearily across the waters, and silently cursed the events that had dragged him away from his land and family and onto this cold and lonely station. What could he have done when they had come to his home town of Hadath looking for a Sharp-eye to join the crew? His oath prevented him from declining a direct request from a high priest. The priests expected utter submission from those who worked the land, especially if one was born with the gift of a lesser divine-gene and had to swear fealty to the First. Insolence and oath breaking were severely punishable, the worst cases usually ended in public execution. He only hoped that in his absence his eldest son would deal reverently with the priests which came by each week to provide coin and collect the weeks mined ore. Priests never did seem like the trustworthy types to him anyway, with their lush purple robes and Mind-Gene tricks, always preaching Imbalance and chaos. They certainly were, however, hungry for iron ore. He chuckled to himself thinking of the Priest sleeping soundly in his cabin below, and how he had fret at dinner the other night when he was served the same slop as the rest of them.
He was interrupted from his thoughts by a dark speck slowly resolving itself in the distance, despite the thick mist that had been plaguing the vessel for the past 2 weeks, his enhanced vision could make out a faint outline in the distance. Stunned, he willed his vision to see further and pierce the thick mist. Sure enough, he made out the shape of an island. He reached over with numb hands and began to ring the rusty bell which hung off the mast.

“By the Will….” he whispered. They had finally made it.



The Priest

The Priest woke to the muffled sound of feet slapping the deck and bustling activity as the crew came suddenly alive. Shaken to awareness by a loud and commanding voice bellowing orders, he sat up and listened to the cacophony on the deck, a realization blooming in his sleep-addled mind.

“Stow those Sails!”, he heard the first mate yelling. “Prepare the oars and get ready to row, men!”

The priest started, shocked into wakefulness. What is this? He thought. After 6 long months, had this tedious and uncompromising journey actually come to an end? What would await them upon their arrival? Apprehension grew in him, so he stood hastily and yelped as he bumped his head on an overhead beam. He reached up with a once well-manicured hand to check for a wound while ducking under the beam exaggeratedly. Luckily the only damage was a sharp throbbing, which left him wishing his steward was there to run him a hot bath and ease his discomfort with a grooming. He uncomfortably glanced to the dull barrel, which stood in the corner of his room, and was acutely aware of his present situation- There would be no steward or bath. In fact, there was barely any water left for a wash. He walked over to check the water level and saw that the barrel was nearly empty, save for a measly pool of brownish water at the bottom. He reached in with a cupped hand and slurped some of it up, cringing at the bitter, woody taste.

The captain had refused to refill his barrel on account of the crew’s needs, the Principle he called it. He hadn’t even listened to the arguments the Priest had given concerning his significance in this mission. He was the high priest of the church of Revolution after all, the one entrusted with the duty of Divine messenger! This mission was hopeless without him! He was the only one on board with a Mind-gene, which made him capable of understanding things no normal man could fathom, and hence deliver the Will of a God. Only he could harness the magnificent power of the Origin and survive the ordeal. Only he had the Will to receive it. Still, he had to eat and drink like a lowly lesser-divine sailor! The fact that he could attune his Mind to tap all the sensory divine-genes gave him a power not many men could challenge but still, using his Power-Gene, the captain ordered that water and food be shared evenly upon his vessel. This gene brought all to subservience while on the ship. Subservience! An authority only the church should be able to command, but direct descendants of the First Exile were all born with the ability to influence the Minds of those who swore the Oath. The church had paid a large portion of Iron for that crooked captains services, his silence was paramount. For too long have the ancient scriptures and Power-genes of the First limited the churches Evolution. He knew that would all change soon though, and that knowledge had given him some respite on the trip. But if he failed all would have been in vain… He couldn’t! The Priest would succeed, had to succeed.  Yet, despite his wavering confidence, his faith had taught him well; The Will of Revolution always got its way.

He walked over to his adorned wooden chest and pulled the heavy lid up. He would wear his most lavish robe today. The one stitched from dyed minx fur, its hood lined with bright peacock feathers that cascaded down the back of the robe and made the wearer seem fierce yet noble if worn correctly. He pulled it over his head and let it drop down to his feet, then turned the hood up over his head. He then picked out a beautiful white velvet stole and adjusted it so that the ends fell around his shoulders and crossed securely at the chest. He quickly inspected himself on a crude metal sheet the captain had brought in after he had rebuked him for the lack of accommodation in the cabin. Principle or no Principle, he would not live like a beast.

Satisfied with his appearance, the Priest whispered a solemn prayer to thank Revolution for this blessed and unpredictable day and reached for his Staff of Mind. He left his cabin and made his way to the deck in a slow, deliberate, pace so as not to trip over his robes. His ascent up the stairs was ever so elegant, something he achieved despite the rocking boat by using his Mind-gene to enhance Grace. He was the Divine Emissary, stumbling was not acceptable.

As he walked up onto the deck, he was greeted by a frenzy of bustling sailors. None of which even bothered to stop and hail as they should have. He stood there looking slightly irritated and focused his Sight, throwing his gaze towards the island slowly appearing on the horizon, and away from the bustling sensory overload which was currently the deck.
“Oy! Priest!” a crewmate in passing asked without using the proper honorific, “ye ken she burns like the Book of Revolution says?”
Ignoring the insolent sailor, he focused his Mind and using Greater Perception, was able to make out an island in the distance, its single smoldering peak reaching up into the sky. He boosted his hearing and heard a distinct droning hum emanating from it. A warm pleasant sensation began to crawl through him and knew that the insufferable months of indefinite travel were finally over. They had returned where The First had been exiled for believing in the Power of Revolution, swearing to abandon the Power of Origin. This was it! The Origin was within reach! He could feel the Will of Revolution stir within him as if awakened by the droning hum emanating from somewhere deep within the island. The power to destroy worlds would be his to take. The Church would finally break the influence the First had over them and reign the coming era of Chaos for themselves.

The Watcher

The Watcher hummed the Hymn of Sight and considered his duty. His father had been a Watcher, and his father’s father too, as were all his forefathers. And now, it all ended with him. The Holy Constant buzzed in the background, the island vibrating with the intensity of it, its pulse reverberating through the worlds. He stood on his perch above the clouds on the peak of Mount Haleka watching the distant vessel approach in silent disbelief.

He wore a glowing Q’aba jewel on his forehead, which contained a sliver of the Hearth and pulsated along with the Constant- the humming vibration that the Origin emitted, the anchor of worlds which kept the Eternal Storm at bay. A warm bear-fur cloak covered his strong shoulders and he was bare chested underneath despite the cold. A massive sword hung at his waist, and in his hand, he carried the large blazing staff which he had used to ignite the monolithic warning beacon that would notify the people of the prophesized return. The beacon, built over the generations, was so large that it had to be built around the mountain peak itself, and now it burned.
Many generations ago, the first Watcher climbed the mountain to act as guardian of the Holy Constant’s Power, for it had been foretold that one day in the future, the children of the Exiled First, which had been tainted by the Will of Revolution, would return to claim the Power of Origin and use it to tip the balance. Sure enough, that day had come.

The Watcher raised his free hand to shade his eyes as he looked away from the incoming boat to solemnly take in the rising sun. The mountain blazed above him, its fiery heat prickling his skin, he began to hum the Hymn of Courage. The tone of his voice merged with the Constant harmoniously and formed an inspirational resonance that calmed him, and helped him focus on the task at hand. The children of Origin could enhance and share many emotions this way.

Everyone would be humming Courage on this day, for today Courage would determine the result. The Watcher looked towards the town center and saw that the community on the island had begun its journey into the Hearth, the hallowed crystal Caverns deep in the heart of Mount Haleka, where the Holy Constant’s hum originated, and the Power would be created. The people would strengthen the Holy Constant and hum the correct hymn when the time was right, acting to provide the watcher with the Power of Origin so he could face the Agent of Revolution. If he succeeded in drawing the Will of Revolution into him, then he would hold the power of creation in his hand. He unconsciously began to Hum Resolve along to the Constant as he made his way to the coast to face his burden, his hand resting on his Bastard Sword. The Origin would survive this.

The Child

She stood before the crevice which led to the Hearth, hand clasped in her mothers, watching the people lined up to enter behind them. Not so many left, she saw, and they all hummed Courage. The Hymn was spectacular, though despite the waves of courage that shook her, the mouth of the caves frightened her. It looked suspiciously like a gaping mouth waiting expectantly for a meal. Bluish light emanated from within eerily, its Glow pulsating along with the sound of the Holy Constant, which felt really loud in her ears almost drowning her own Hymn of Courage out. She hadn’t mastered the Ancient Gift yet and was having trouble attaining the correct tones, making the hymn less effective and reducing her courage. She looked to her mother and saw worry in her large green eyes. She hummed Attention at her, attempting to gain acknowledgment. Her mother looked down at her tenderly and hummed Affection.
‘What’s wrong Child? Do you fear the caves?’ Her mother asked, concern showing behind her comforting smile. Dark face tinted blue by the light, she looked older than usual. Her black hair was tied back in a tight bun, causing her face to look taught. The child looked up and nodded her agreement.
‘It looks hungry’, the child said.
Her mother laughed, but it sounded strained.
‘Beyond that crevice, child, is a path that leads to the Hearth. It is our sanctuary, our safe place.’ She said sweetly, attempting to comfort the worried looking child. ‘You must not be afraid. Practice humming Courage loudly so that I can hear it. It will also help everyone else to have an added voice to the Hymn, especially me.’ She winked at the child and turned back to walk in pace.
The Child hummed Resolve to herself quickly, strengthening her determination, then switched to Courage in a loud and well intoned voice. She saw her mother stand straighter at that. The child buzzed with the hymn and it brought a wave of courage she hadn’t perceived before, her own. It was powerful, and removed any trace of concern she had had. She released her mother’s hand and looked excitedly towards the cave mouth, the Hearth now beckoning her.

Once inside, the sound of the Holy Constant intensified. It beat against her, and she forced herself to hum louder as she followed the flow of people towards the sanctuary. Glowing Q’aba crystal shards grew in an inward spiraling pattern around the cave walls, she knew that they would eventually join the Giant cluster deep inside; the Origin. The cavern floor was a smooth rock that seemed wet but wasn’t, it was cold under her feet as she stepped in line with the others. They were led downwards, and she saw where the cave wall grew so tight it would only let one person through at a time. There would be a large chamber up ahead filled with buzzing people as they hummed and revolved around the Origin. She could hear excited whispers all around her, the prophecy had come true, the time to support the watcher was upon them.
‘I saw the beacon, was a great blistering fire it was! The whole Peak took fire in seconds like a hell-fire!’ She heard one man exclaim.
‘I saw it too’, came his friends curt reply. ‘Yer not the only one with eyes man! Hurry up! I heard the Elder would speak once we’re all safely inside and the ceremony begins.’
‘Really? Where d’ye hear that?’ asked the man, shocked. The Elder did not have a habit of speaking. The child had heard he was older than time itself.
‘Sister Aisha said so when she announced the Return to my wife, she said the Elder would address us directly.’ Came the response.

Excited to hear the Elder, the child turned towards the pass and saw she was next in line after an elderly man. She stepped up onto a carved out stepping stone and stared at the tiny opening lined with jagged crystals, even for someone her size it was a tight squeeze. she looked back and found her mother gently urging her forward, humming Urgency at her; the Elders speech would commence soon. She stooped and stepped through gingerly, careful not to hit her head on any sharp crystals. She stood up straight and beheld the Origin for the First time.
A tower of crystals took up the entire center of the deep cavern, seeming to have once exploded outwards violently from beneath the ground. The cluster trailed crystals towards each of the connecting caverns. The crystals were brightest here and spiraled all around a single Giant shard that vibrated visibly, and pulsated brightly. It loomed monolithically around a swirling hoard of people all humming courage, the rhythm a crescendo of emotion and sound that beat against her and caused her to stop short. She looked for her mother, afraid to lose her in the crowd and saw her stepping in behind her. The child reached out and took her mother’s hand, and they began to make their way towards the spiraling mass.
‘The Watcher will begin his duty soon Child, lets join the humming ceremony and lend him our courage.’ Her Mother said over the loud humming, falling in rhythm with the massive crowd. The child followed, stepping in pace to her mother and not knowing what to expect.
She looked up and hummed uncertainty to her mother ‘Just do what I do Child, do not worry, let the Hymn of Courage guide you.’ She responded confidently.
The child noted how the Hymn seemed to reverberate here, as if it were always a part of the Holy Constant and not the voice of thousands of people. The harmonic resonances were perfect complements to the vibrations and emotions she could feel in her heart. This was natural, she knew this… Stepping and humming, then again, stepping and humming. She stopped being a child and just became a fragment of the Origin, a hallowed frequency in the spectrum of the Holy Constant.
The Elder Spoke from within the Crystals, and the Origin shook with an ancient voice: ‘My Brother’s Children have arrived, The Watcher Goes to meet his fate at last.’ The chorus of humming grew frenzied and began to affect the crystals, the singular swirling mass that was gaining momentum began to glow along to the Constant.
The Elder’s words echoed through the crystal-lit cave. ‘With our help, He has a chance to succeed and hold both the Will of Revolution and The Holy Constant in his heart.’ The Large central column grew brighter than a star and began to pulsate faster and faster, the humming intensifying.

‘Through this act of Courage and Transcendence we shall be preserved, and continue on preserving in return. Let us bid him farewell and lend him strength, for only the victor shall ascend into Godhood and choose the fate of our Being.’ The mad swirling and humming reached an unthinkable frequency, tearing at the fabric of existence.

‘Now Sing my children!’ The Elder announced, ‘Sing with all your hearts!’
And the swirling mass began to hum the Hymn of Transcendence.
A beam of blue light shot out of the center of the swirling mass and traveled along the crystals seeking its way out, it rushed along spiraling its way towards the cave entrance and exploded out towards the place where the Watcher and Priest stood facing each other in determination, weapons drawn.


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This dark field, overgrown with carnivorous vegetables, is where I found myself. The sweet smell of decomposed flesh coupled with the damp air, overwhelm the senses and cause instant panic. Where was I and more importantly, how did I come to be here? Breath, relax, what had happened?

As my eyes focused and my senses adjusted, I caught slight movement from the corner of my eye and saw a field lettuce devour a small mammal, I blinked and looked away, then looked back. Blood dribbled to the dirt through the leaves as the lettuce relished its catch and began cleaning itself with a grotesque purplish tongue the color of ancient Phoenician shores… I took a deep breath, the gagging smell of spoiled meat and excrement made me heave, and fear began to creep back up my spine, something was wrong, I wasn’t high and I wasn’t dreaming, at least I didn’t think so. Had I been abducted?

I dared to look around. The hills in the distance shimmered with a strange emphatic light and the air was crisp and cold. The ground underneath me felt warm, as if having baked under a warm sun all day. My vision was clear and my consciousness whole, holy shit I was awake!

I dug my fingers into the dirt and stretched my legs out, my head ached dully and my muscles felt sore, I felt like a train had run me over…

This was real, or at least that was my impression, it was real. When I was tripping and astral projecting I could never see or feel my body; the limits of my skin dissolved and there was no “I” so to speak that I could relate to. Now as if to make sure, I looked down at my body and saw that I was just lying on the grass awfully close to a mean looking cactus which seemed to be watching me menacingly. Real or not, I was freaked the fuck out and when Alux Aliester was freaked, he left the premises and sought out a quiet place to relax and just be.

As I stood up and brushed myself off, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d been here before, déjà vu intuition had taken over and I half expected the sudden flash which blinded me and threw me flat on my butt. Pain, real pain, raced up my spine affirming once again the reality of this moment.

Whiteness.  I could hardly see but I could smell, and it stank of herring and ocean. As my vision began to fade back in, I regained my composure, stood up slowly and looked around gracelessly for the source of the strange flash. I saw no immediate trace of it, but slowly my eyes began resolving an impossible silhouette.

“Hello there” Said a melancholic sexless voice, utterly creepy in its neutrality and curiosity, “looking for me”?

I turned to the voice and saw the creature which caused me to give up on all I had once learned concerning evolution, life and everything.

Before me stood a walking, talking Delphinus like being- shiny grey skin, and piercing black eyes, vestigial blow hole and all. The creature stood seven or eight feet tall, on two leg like appendages which still resembled fins if looked at closely. The thing had a mouth full of teeth and was currently smiling at me sinisterly. It carried a staff made from some kind of spiraling wood that held a prism of light on its crown on which was carved the shape of a tree. The source of light I thought to myself. The fear of being eaten alive by vegetation suddenly a faded memory, I found myself entranced by this beings very existence.

We stood like that a moment, scrutinizing each other, I didn’t know what to do next. I dared myself to meet its gaze and saw something remarkable. This creature was sad, it was kind and it loved me deeply. I knew this instantly when our eyes met. The feeling of déjà vu intensified, did I somehow know this creature? I clumsily brushed my auburn hair aside and tried to get it under control, unfortunately I had left my hair-tie, and sanity, behind.


“Long lost child of light, what are you doing in this forgotten field”? It asked me, ignoring the obviously frightened expression I must have been wearing on my face.

“The forgotten field?” I mumbled, unable to find a reasonable thing to say. “I just came to be here, with no recollection of how or why” I managed.

“Hmm”, came the response. This seemed a sufficient answer, for the beast nodded knowingly and its smile grew toothier and sinister. The Prism on top of the staff began to pulse a soft pink.


“W-w-what are you?!” I stammered scared and confused, wanting to be back at home where Dave was probably playing my favorite video game. Dave….

“Where am I?!”
Dammit Dave, if you dosed me in my sleep, I’ll have your head!!!” I yelled hoping, however unlikely, that this bad trip would end and that I would come down and still retain some semblance of sanity. I wanted to run and run and run, I wanted out, it couldn’t be real. I was just going crazy. I Began backing away and made to run far away.

The Delphine saw my courage fail, and suddenly emitted a burst of low frequency sound which invaded me and caused all my fear to melt away. Wave after wave the sound enveloped me in warmth and fuzziness. I stood transfixed, as visions of decay began to assault me-

I could feel everything… all the life being sucked away from everything, only to be replaced by an addictive desire, an unstoppable thirst for mercurial objects and imaginary wealth.

“Stop” I sobbed, “please stop… It’s too much, I can’t…” tears filled my eyes and bile rose in my throat, a myriad of hot emotions awoke in me. I was calm and sad, but also angry and afraid at what I had seen. The vision still burnt into my mind like the after-sight of a dream. That feeling of déjà vu was pressing against my mind, as pervasive as a Candiru fish.

Exasperatedly I gave myself in to the feeling and let it sit. This was important, every fiber of my being screamed attention at this point as if finally awakened by the sound. I gave in to it, and looked up. Determined to know the truth of what was going on.

“Do not be scared” the creature said calmly, “you are in the presence of a member of the most ancient beings on this planet! My name is not Dave, it’s Darbgah and I’m here to guide you forward, towards the eternal realm”.

I stared at Darbgah, the effects of the sound blast still gripping me and calming me so that I could somehow process some of the information I was receiving.

“The oldest beings… eternal realm…” What was he talking about I thought. Did this have something to do with what I saw during that strange aural blast? A few things had become clear to me straight away. It was vital, and it was in trouble, diseased or infected. The eye I had seen resembled the all Seeing Eye which certain philosophers associated with universal mind- consciousness apart from Ego. This Delphinus being claimed to be ancient, and the symbol carved into the prism resembled the tree of life I had seen. There were the numbers 13 and 33, which run deep in freemasonry and the American constitution as well as Abrahamic religious text, I wonder if this could be, were all those crazy conspiracy theorists right?

Darbgah saw the comprehension begin to dawn on my face and gave me a toothy smile while making a very human-like gesture with his fin as if to say bring it on!

I wanted answers! “Darbgah, do you know how I came to be here and why? What did you show me just now? I feel very strange…”

“You have no recollection of finding us, because the way was shown to you by a part of your biology which is eternally tied to us, you have been called forth along with 6 of your Kin to undertake a most perilous endeavor” he replied heavily. “More clarification will ensue, follow me please, we have no more time to waste”.

Drabgah turned left and began walking at a swimming pace. Dumbfounded and with complete lack of resistance, I followed intrigued at his response and growing more curious by the second. What in god’s name had I gotten myself into this time? I wondered. I was able to see many acts of synchronicity everywhere and was slowly beginning to trust my new friend.

“You came to be here metaphysically through a wormhole in your DNA, do not be alarmed all human DNA is encoded with this gene, only the high priest can activate it” continued Drabgah, “yours was activated while you were asleep in order to smooth the transition, as the body takes quite a toll folding in on itself, and remolecularization is never a pleasant experience. Not to mention the effect on the mind, in dreams we accept certain things which we couldn’t in our waking lives.” It hobbled along, and led me towards the edge of the field, where a dark hill loomed over the plane and wavered strangely in the shimmering air.

“Hey Drabgah?” I asked as we walked along a misbegotten path towards the dark hill which I saw was littered with talk black stones, “can you tell me a little about this place? You mentioned the forgotten field earlier, what was that about?”

After some silence Drabgah sighed, and stopped walking and turned to me, sadness suddenly filled the air like a scent, I was worried I’d be hit those sound waves again, but there only came another sigh and: “My long lost friend, we have failed this planet and it’s being. The time has come for us to tell the truth. Come now, the high priest awaits our arrival, All will be explained then”.

So, we walked on, reaching the beginning of the slope leading out of the forgotten field and up onto the hill, beyond all seemed still and dark. For the first time since I cracked my eyes open, I looked up at the sky and noticed the lack of moonlight. Instead the sky was filled with a strange shimmering, as soon as the eye glimpsed the shimmering it moved away so that the eyes seemed to constantly follow certain points- Always being drawn to the center, where it was darkest. In fact seeing it reminded me awfully a lot of coming to grips with that sense of déjà vu.

“Your mind”, began Drabgah, “is a fractal of the greater Mind of our cosmos, the lights you see are merely free thoughts roaming around in the void of yonder darkness” He pointed his staff to the point in the sky which was the darkest and as I followed his gaze I slowly began perceiving the spiraling nature of the darkness and of the light, the very intrinsic shape of it I thought- Just like a ying and yang. Dragbah continued to speak in that strange sexless voice, “this forgotten field is where being and non-being, or light and darkness, exist simultaneously, it is if you wish an island of existence between two worlds. In your world light could be white, whereas adjacently the opposite is true. Such variations exist endlessly through the cosmos, always paired in polar opposites, alternatively.”

“What was with the carnivorous vegetables?” I cut in somehow feeling a connection there and hoping to rationalize what I had experienced.

“The beings that inhabit this field are not as you know them, as I mentioned the extremities meet, so it is not uncommon to find carnivorous plants and herbivores, all of them somatic.” He left it at that mysterious note and picked up his pace.

While walking, a stanza from Zepplin’s “Stairway to Heaven” infatuated me shortly- “and as we wind on down the road, our shadows taller than our souls, there walks a lady we all know, who shines white light and wants to show….”

The road ahead began to steepen and our pace quickened, Drabgah seemed in a hurry now. I could hear the wheezing and billowing out of the blow-hole all in a shuddering rhythm that made me wonder at her (his?) origins, everything about her screamed femininity at me but yet, I wasn’t sure. There was yet something absolutely sexless about her and the way she spoke. I stared at her caped, arched back and saw her dorsal fin protruding from a slit in the garment glittering in that strange light-nonlight of the ether, it was embroidered in spiraling symbols and waving patterns, I made note of strange leather bands dangling off the edges of that green cape. I took in her ancient nature and began to wonder at that, there were funny anecdotes about Atlaneans and cetaceans which I had recently read about in an article by a certain Mary Sutherland, An esoteric writer whose book I had randomly found on a shelf at the local bookstore. Something about Whales and dolphins being the result of evolution from an ancient “pre-cetacean” race of mammalian beings bred by reptilian creatures from the constellations of Sagittarius which had come to settle the earth in the very distant past.

“We have nearly arrived to the portal” said Drabgah, well she more than said it, she spoke fluidly into my thought pattern, it occurred to me that I was aware of that voice the same kind of way I heard my thoughts, it had taken me a minute to realize what was happening when Drabgah spoke to me, she was speaking telepathically! I guess having been so deep in thought helped me mark the difference. No wonder it sounded so sexless.
“Alux, hear me now as you will. I am glad you have come to terms with me so fast, but proper introductions must wait. Once we are near the portal, you will feel an intense desire to rush into it, but you must resist. Unguided one can be lost in dematerialization for a bitter eternity.”

The calling of my name snapped me to attention, “What should I do? How will I have the will to resist?” I asked ready to indulge and anticipating my first ride through a teleporter. Well, first conscious ride. I was frightened, this was all happening kind of fast.

Drabgah turned to me a big sweet smile on her face full of teeth-rank with the smell of fish- and she greeted me with a flurry of excited chitters, each of which sent waves of empathy through my spine, I smiled back helplessly, somehow I had missed her.

“You must ride on my back, old friend.” She pushed the thought gently into my mind, clear as day and natural as ever.

I looked up while she led me forward, her fin extended towards me, but all I could see was a turbulent maelstrom the color of stars and the night sky. Beams of light shot out and arched into the sky fantastically to sizzle against the black monoliths surrounding the place we stood in. Every hair on my body stood at attention, the energy that permeated the air was devastating. I wanted to dive in, the desire was unmistakable, like needing to jump into the ocean on a hot day but tenfold.
“Come and hold onto me, that way you won’t dash in, once we are in range.”
The command blazed in my mind. I reached out and grabbed hold of her fin, the contact broke my trance and I was able to look away from the gnarly vortex. And stared at her for instruction.

“Lean into me and strap your legs through those leather hoops, then hold onto my dorsal fin or wrap your arms around me, which ever you feel more secure with.”

I did as I was bid almost too fluently and naturally, it all seemed so damn familiar godammit. A hand on her fin and one around the side, I spoke to her with my mind.

“Surge on old friend” I thought to her dearly, and so she did. Chittering and clicking wildly, an ecstatic feel to her, a laugh of joy caught in my throat and I held on tighter as she made to jump into the maelstrom.  We bonded then under those words and energies, and an inkling of hope rose in Drabgah’s aura. I felt it clear as a fluent note. She dove in, I held my breath. Color exploded in my vision, synesthesia overwhelmed me and I felt my being disintegrating, but then an ephemeral chitter and click brought my consciousness back to the moment as we surged through the wormhole towards my destiny.

Chapter 2

As we were projected forward, our Forms dematerializing in a trail of waves and particles, our Being held onto one another, clinging to the physical shape of the bodies we left behind. Held together by our genetic memory, our spirit surged on.

As the colors continued to rush by and my physical senses overlapped to the point of no recognition, our consciousness mingled and all the barriers melted away. I forgot myself and we became metaphysically complete. I knew this was meant to be, I was certain. That nagging feeling of déjà vu resolved itself in the form of a blissful remembrance, a young woman dressed in brilliant mage cloth fighting alongside Drabgah, who was bedecked in dazzling armor consisting of mail and mother of pearl, a fearsome trident in her fin and a vicious snarl on her face. The woman was protecting Drabgah with aural shields while she held the front line of a battle alongside six other creatures.  There was an affinity to the memory as if it belonged to me, I wasn’t sure anymore… who was that women fighting and casting protection spells in the Mage Cloth?

I wanted a closer look and as the intention set in I felt myself drifting towards the scene helplessly. I was suddenly afraid, the only battle experience I have is behind my computer screen massacring a horde of zombies. I didn’t belong here!

I could feel Drabgah’s voice tugging at my thoughts, I opened my mind to hers and heard her call out my name.

“Alux!” bellowed Drabgah, “beware not to lose yourself in your eternal memory. It is good to remember but this is not the time! You are taking us off course!”

I brought myself back to the present, the taste of Alux strong in my mind’s eye, and the rushing colors along Drabgahs meta-form resonating underneath me- its dolphin smelling frequency.

Drabgah chittered,
“Prepare yourself for reformation” she warned “we shall be exiting the stream soon”

I focused my consciousness and prepared for something I had no Idea how to prepare for. Yet, I was focusing and prepared; no doubt in my Mind. The texture around us ripped with a very sharp sounding twang of yellow and I saw white light coming towards us at an incredible speed, I began to scream but had no mouth to scream out of.

I was just about to implode with fear when we collided with the light and broke through a barrier of sorts where I painfully felt my body regenerate one particle and wave at a time. My senses re-aligned themselves despite my unwillingness. My vision came flooding back as we tumbled out onto a grassy floor. It was all overwhelming, all I could perceive was the taste of vomit on my lips and a belligerent head which ached from inside-out. I heard myself groan and then tried to look up my vision was swimming before me and I could hear Drabgah calling out my name, then all was dark.

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A Strange Day

Mindless noise- incredible sound and bass variations entangled with fluctuating electronic chaos that shakes the earth underneath our feet. We are currently walking down the inhumane path that leads to the underground realm underneath Beirut, the air is dense with acrid smoke that lazily circulates right underneath our noses. Here we go I think to myself, one more time, down the rabbit hole… I inhale as much of the smoke as I can, while exhaling, I couldn’t help but smile. You see, in order to get to Beat City, one must silence the mind and its primary function- to respond to reality. Beat city is everything but “real”, it exists outside of our collective perception of reality.

The smoke was escaping through cracks in the soil , enveloping all that it touched, it rose in cataclysmic patterns, forming a thick plane suspended in mid-air that swirled and coiled as we moved through it. My loyal companion Nick was inhaling as much smoke as he could, crazy bastard! Only those in an altered state of consciousness could perceive the portal that leads to Beat City. I see it as a door, perception differs; the observer projects an idea which is manifested as whatever the conscious being imagines a portal to be – the smoke is the key to our beloved city.
As we wind on down the increasingly menacing path, the music intensifies. It fills our heads with fierce vibrations that cause solid matter to shake and tremble. The trees along the path that have guided us to our present location seem to have suffered a retched fate. They were rent and distorted, twisting and morphing into what looked like insane creatures infatuated with despair. The moonshine fell, almost unbearably, upon the hideous, sad expressions the trees were manifesting- a warning that plagues the mind as we walk on- Beware the madness!

A familiar vibe runs up my wrenched spine, I think I said something like: “hey nick, I’m looking into the eye of the strange animal. No, I’m looking at a little girl with red hair. We are being tested; can we support such madness? Can we prevail in such incoherent and mad states of mind?”
Of course though, my friend nick saw it too; his eyes were wide and full of surprise, and he was smiling. It seems we would prevail, time and time again, our minds still had not snapped. Suddenly the little girl with red hair turns around and begins to skip ahead- naturally, we follow.

We follow our guide up the path for another 10 minutes or so, she then stops abruptly, lets out an inhuman moan, and perishes. At first, the path seems unchanged, but a subtle change in the air all around us catches my attention, Oxygen levels begin to decrease. We are being mentally and physically prepared for the underground, lungs feel pressured, and every breath brings a rush of chemicals to the brain, releasing Dopamine, Serotonin, Epinephrine and Endorphins- our eyes roll back in our heads and our souls rush out of our mouths. They hang around, free of the shackles that bind it to the body. To see, taste, smell, hear and feel with intensity so fierce, the soul is ecstatic- we function at ten times our normal efficiency. Pupils dilate, we are sucked in through the awesome hole in the fibonaccian nil of our heads, and the door appears…

This place we have escaped to is completely unstained by human greed and self-conceived reality- the reality that has incarcerated the soul, the reality in which matter has enslaved the mind. We are the dreamless youth of our fallen empire
The desolate generation of the post world unification era, the children of this new world order.
Our intense need for comfort and our fear of uncertainty, our immaculate creation- our frail empire. 
Dissolved, nullified, annihilated. We are unlearned our perceptions can be reconfigured and rearranged 
Welcome to The Rabbit Hole – enter a whole different world of motivation
See that each atom in our anatomy was born in the death of a star 
Realize that all knowledge does not exist apart from us
experience the fleeting moment 
let the truth come 
A period is but a point at which one idea ends and the other begins, a point at which I am given the opportunity to transcend (or descend) my previous thoughts and claims. It is also symbolic of a singularity, the point from which the universe burst open and…

“what?” asks a disembodied voice.

Had I said that out loud? where was I?

“Huh?” I come too from this reverie to witness an awesome sight.
“You just said “the period came”! Groaned he. “Stop saying asinine shit man… not at a time like this… I can see the stink of some dog turd somewhere and… i can hear it too! it makes an awful squelchy noise…”
“well” I explained, “might be cause you stepped in it, and are doing so repeatedly you fucking retard. you’re not synesthetic yet merely… uninhabited.”  this calmly.

“Awwww! god damn it! tell me why is it every time we trip together one of us has to step in shit!! god damn it!”
Nick was evidently flustered by this, and just tore his shoes off with a mighty flick of the ankle. “Bah! Who needs shoes anyway”!

Goddamn hobbit! I thought. He was right though, shit in all its forms, figurative and literal, seemed to follow us each time we ate the fruit of it. well now, i think this thought requires no more transcendence…

“What are we gonna do now?” he demanded “My feet are cold and you look like you’ve been thinking too hard”, exclaimed he.

Indeed comfort awaited, El-Diablo Azure- Our trusty bong, pre packed and waiting to be ignited with a controlled flame we tended to generate with colorful plastic objects filled with butane…
Prometheus was a good Titan wasn’t he?

“Alright” I said, “lets head home then, Let me just go say good bye to that tree over yonder”.

“What! Wait! What! Fuckin’! tree! man! there’s no time for your hippy shit! the cold is creeping into my spine man through my feet!”
So we walked home, the balding, muttering-machine who was now shoe-less as well, and I.

As I fumbled for the keys, Nick, ever prone to Murphy’s law, begins to turn yellow before my very eyes.
“Ugh” he groaned
Damn key, why don’t these things ever fit into the keyholes? easy enough to open metaphysical doors out there in the ether, but these solid things were a real challenge i reckoned. Doors to our very own cell within this false organism we call reality. Shut out from otherness.
He was drooling now, oh shit, this is not a good sign… damn key!

And the door swung open, I looked at nick, he looked at me, a seemingly eternal moment passed.
“The Fuck?” I thought as i began to step forward
“MOVE!!!” came a frightening snarl from this livid beast.
he lurched forward and made to run to the toilet with his mouth covered with one hand and the other holding his stomach. While intention is a very admirable at this point, lets be realistic. Murphy fucking watches…
He stumbled, and began to fall…

I heard him heave before he thudded to the ground and projectile vomited all over the carpet, at the point of impact.
“uuuummmmm fuck” came the death rattle.

And the beast was still, laying ever so majestically in a remarkable puddle of regurgitated mushroom pizza.
GET THE FUCK UP AND CLEAN THIS SHIT NICK! I yelled, through a fit of the giggles.

Comfort would have to wait it seemed. what was it Lennon said?
“Life is what happens when your busy making plans”

We cleaned up, I had a few doubtful moments, common to all those of us who have cleaned up puke, where I though I was going to add to the mess rather than clean it, but alas for Murphy; even he is a victim of his own law.
We settled down on the couch.

“Ah! much better” sighed Nick.
“You fat bastard, first the shit and then a mile of half digested pizza! King of food in all its tenses! future, present and past! Next ill know you’ll be making your famous beef and broccoli stew which happens to smell the same as it does after you pass it!” I announced as I snatched the bong off the table.

I reached into my pocket to grab my trusty fire thingy and a sense of dread so deep filled me.

“Nick.for.gods.sake.the.lighter” I whimpered.

“Don’t have it man, think we left it near that tree you were speaking to, and now that you mention it, beef and broccoli sounds great!”

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The Spiral’s Quest

There was once a time when all that is wasn’t. In fact nothing had yet become. A time that did not move forward, for it was still and calm, like a frozen lake.

Within this dormant instance, there was a spiral. Now this spiral, being only a few seconds old makes nothing of this occurrence. Small and insignificant, It simply swam in colors and slept under patterns, almost non existent. It drifted along until suddenly it grew restless and anxious. Something else was there and it felt like it was being watched, somehow the spiral felt exposed and frightened. “Who’s there?” Spiral exclaimed, “What do you want?”

No one answered the frightened spiral’s questions, and so it went off  terrified and confused indeed. It went and went until it could go no more. setting itself in motion.

Tired and hungry the spiral drifted off to sleep its motion continuous now. When Spiral awoke, there was no memory of the fright it had experienced at the idea of an Other. Instead, it was filled with the strangest feeling of loneliness.

“Maybe, there really was something out there”, thought Spiral. “Maybe I could find the seer and see it myself”.
Hurriedly, the spiral set out searching for that which was watching it. It searched and searched and searched until soon enough, it came across a deep chasm. As it peered over, it felt a presence and was intrigued.
“HELLO!” it called out “IS THERE ANYONE THERE?”.

Something stirred beyond the vast emptiness; a large shape emerged from the darkness across the chasm. Large amber eyes stared back at the frightened spiral.
The spiral, nameless as all things were at that time, was in awe at the shape before it. It was large and old, and seemed very lonely.

I see you! can it be?what are you doing there? Asked the giant shape, surprised at seeing, and being seen by an other.

The little spiral was confused: “this is where I am!” it responded strongly, conviction resonating in its voice.

“Yes, you are here now.” the shape answered hope and tears brimming in her eyes, “Welcome! My name is Om; I Am and have always Been.”

“your name?” Asked the spiral, “What’s that?”

“A name”, replied Om. “Is a word that creates Form and order from disorder and abstraction, a word that sets things in motion. It is a symbol made just for you; an Order, an Idea and a Sound, to resonate within you and bring being forth”.
“You will be named Ab” she benevolently bowed her head and spoke the words:  “Ab I grant you this gift with all my love, and hope you will not resent me for it.”

Ab the spiral felt a tremendous surge ripple through it. It was reveling in the process. It thought and thought, “Ab”? It wondered, “what am I? What is Form and what is Order and what does it all mean? ecstatically the spiral began to reverberate and to progress, its center began to swirl and swell as the ideas took root, each concept and set of things separating from the core forcing the spiral to spin its self outward- Being, Form, Order, Love, Resentment; things that were not things but were. Undeniable things that just led to the occurrence of other undeniable things- Non-being, Abstraction, Chaos, Hate and Acceptance. Ab the spiral began to grow further, understanding the process which had begun; it understood that things come in pairs, each it’s own but somehow it’s other as well! Ab understood that he was always meant to meet Om and grow around her as she slowly shrunk and dissipated.
Shocked at the realization Ab beheld Om lovingly and accepted their duality and inseparability, reaching over the void to embrace her.

At Ab’s touch Om let her breath out in a tremendous shuddering sigh and whispered tiredly, a deadly exhaustion settling in her voice: “Soon you will envelope me and I will recede, and hold you still as you expand. I imagine you will have some work to do, naming  the forms which are beginning to coalesce with in you. It is difficult and I have been working a long time and am no where near finished”

“Yes!” Answered Ab, “Will you help? You already named so many things! what are they? I cannot put my finger on it! I feel their form burning within me and cannot deny their being but what does it mean?”

“Yes, I will help you and pass along all that I have done”, replied the large shape. A bright and luminous surge burst out of Om and passed into Ab. Ab shuddered and began to glow a starry blue, Om turned a shade darker, the glow in her eyes dissipating. “I have named you, and will prepare you for what is coming. You asked me what it means and I say to you only when all has been named will the meaning be clear!

“Form you have found in me, and can see in yourself” each new form will create more forms and these forms will create more. She paused and set an ancient smiling extinguished eye, on Ab then continued to speak: “Your Being is my opposite, although we are reflections of the same force, you will grow and I will fade. I will return when you begin to fade as you returned to me. The forms must remain.” These last words rung true, as Om faded to nothing her being replaced. In his grief Ab spun a frenzied spin, and reached towards the void searching for his reflection. A warm burst of loss caused a stream to flow.

Thus did the frozen lake begin to thaw; as things gained their names, their presence created Form. Their Form created Force, and Force brought things together and then pulled them apart in a graceful dance.

Ab loved to watch as things began to coalesce into bright points of light and dark points of darkness, though soon it grew bored, and realized that there were a few question left unanswered.

“What is happening? what was the point of all this?”

“Why am I here?” Ab wondered. “My name gave me Form and Order, and with it the rest was named, but what am I doing here”?

Thus did Ab put pieces of himself into the smallest spirals which were made of smaller spirals, and yet even smaller spirals, and gave them eyes just like its own. So he could See and Witness from all angles, to see what seeing was, to find Meaning, and call it by its one true name. They needed names and eventually knew, the had to start the whole process again, the more eyes to see the more things would be named. soon enough all would be named, and Ab would meet Om; finally singular again.
But Ab stared at his creation and beheld a true sight, being must be there is no respite.
Alas! there is no respite.